Even if you found a diamond at a crossroad, keep walking because a car might hit ya.
With the awkward intro, i shall begin this. Exactly why the weird intro? Its because at the moment, I don't actually know where to begin.
Possible reasons why Allah let me get this job.
1. Allah knows me more than I do (of course He does), so he puts me on this job so that I wont do bad stuff during Ramadhan.
2. Allah wants me to see the walks of life who does not really neccesarily follow his way. (I am imagining a huge sign board blinking with warning)
3. Allah wants me to see how a person without patience becomes in the end of the day.
4. Allah's personal reminder to me, as if he is saying "Diana, don't end up like that"
And now, I am out of reason to validate or ponder upon. In fact, I really think that none of the above reason is the real reason. Albeit this, I might have to say that... its better that I am doing this than nothing at all.
To a new point, I am feeling so detached. Somewhere between here and there, I just seemed lost. Is this what coping is all about. My friends and I are at a point where everyone is moving on. New life I might say. Sad? Yeah, i have to admit that. Its an inevitable feeling. But I wish everyone the best of luck.
I was never good at making friends nor keeping them. Im never the one to spill the bean or prying for them. I just exist. Lonely would be a good word for now. I guess it is my fault at some point but hey Im just a human.
Then again, its at these crossroads you would find who to them, you matter the most. Stop chasing those diamond and start looking for charcoal instead. They warm you when its cold, they light for you when its dark and they can give you life.
But most importantly, even when the charcoals are gone, there would still be the One who creates them n He lovez you unconditionally.